[eluser]Dr. Seuss[/eluser]
SOLVED: Here's where I ended up.
RewriteEngine On
RewriteRule ^(application) - [F,L]
DirectoryIndex /static/index.html
RewriteRule ^([a-z0-9_-]+)\.html$ /static/$1.html [L]
RewriteRule ^images/([a-z0-9_-]+)\.gif$ /static/images/$1.gif [L]
RewriteRule ^images/([a-z0-9_-]+)\.jpg$ /static/images/$1.jpg [L]
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d
RewriteRule .* index.php/$0 [PT,L]